Dr.Commander Selvam Siddhar

 

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Marriage Compatibility

                                         -   His Holiness Swamiji Sri SelvamSiddhar

Atharva  Vedic Astrological compatibility is the branch of astrology that studies relationships by comparing natal horoscopes. A natal horoscope is a chart, map, or a snapshot of the planets in the Solar System and their positions in the zodiac at the time of a person's birth. The signs of the Zodiac represent 12 different types of spiritual energy and purpose. The planets in the Solar System are associated with at least one, but most often two signs of the zodiac.

When one knows that one has feelings for a person that one thinks that will lead to marriage then my humble advice is to seek a reputable astrologer to check if the marriage would stand the test of time...

Compatibility in Indian astrology

The Hindu/Indian system of examining compatibility based on horoscopes of the aspirant couple is unique. Horoscope matching is an art of the highest ingenuity of an astrologer. The fundamental concept of matching horoscopes emanates from constellations occupied by the Moon at the time of births of bride and groom. Individuals inherit qualities of the birth constellation. Various constellations represent different natures in respect of their casts, animals presented by them, sex, Gana (God / man / demon), humour, birds ruled, primordial elements, Gotra, directions ruled, consonants and vowels, mutual harmony and repulsion with certain stars, beneficence to the other stars by virtue of mutual distance etc.

In addition, a host of other factors such as longevity of the individuals, character (sexual), widowhood, poverty, progeny, body status, radical strengths and indications, planetary nature and afflictions, currency of major and minor periods, Marakaas (death inflicting planets), placement of Mars in their nativity (MangalDosha), antidotes, propitiations, auspicious time for marriage etc. should be examined to arrive at a suitable union of the couple.

Based on the birth constellations, the following aspects are examined and are given importance and are assigned numeric values - Varna (1 point), Vashya (2 Points), Tara (3 points), Yoni (4 points), GrahaMaitri (5 points), Gana (6 points), Bhakoota (7 points) and Nadi (8 points). The total of these factors adds up to 36 points and a horoscope is considered to be matched only if the compatibility score is more than 18 or 50%.

Significance of various aspects in compatibility are as follows:

Varna : Grade of spiritual development, obedience

Vashya : Mutual control – friendship.

Tara : Mutual beneficence-luck-auspiciousness

Yoni : Sexual aspects, affinity, urge, compatibility.

GrahaMaitri : Psychological disposition, friendship.

Gana : Nature: Dev – Manush – Raakshas

Bhakoota : Children, growth of family.

Nadi: Temperaments, hereditary (Atharva Vedic Astrological), affliction and death to other

Based on the above aspects, mathematical computation is performed to find a match. The astrologer has to use his skills in examining compatibility. It is felt essential to match the horoscopes before further marriage negotiations are done. The above system is in practice for thousands of years in India.

Vedic astrology is very precise and even when Lord Krsna appeared on this planet, the astrologers were consulted… Hindu/Indian astrologers mainly use the BrihatParasharaHoraSastra – The Hindu Astrology Textbook. Firstly the compatibility is only a guideline to a relationship and that has been made clear to the reader in the book. If one is compatible then that relationship can transform into something special like marriage. If one is compatible then that relationship/marriage has a foundation and when there’s a foundation then there’s stability in the marriage…

On the other hand if there’s incompatibility between the couple then that relationship/marriage has no foundation and thus already before the marriage even begins the relationship is not on steady ground. So one has to work even harder to make the marriage work.But to make some feel a little better.. I have seen compatibility charts where the couple was not compatible and they still remain married for years and never divorced… yet couple that where over 80% compatible divorced…why you may ask its because “NO MATTER HOW COMPATIBILE YOU BOTH ARE OR NOT YOU BOTH HAVE TO COMPROMISE TO MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK.” Couples don’t compromise these days and hence divorce rates are skyrocketing.

DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

During one of a seminar, a woman asked a common question. She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?" I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered, "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer. EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love... Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love  easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.Extramaritalfulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression "the labor of love." Because it takes time, effort, and energy and most importantly, it take WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ..You can "make" love.

Love in marriage is indeed a "decision". . Not just a feeling.

Remember this always "God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go."

Love is not the smooth ride you expect. It’s like a car with one bad tire. You’re always having to hold onto the wheel to keep that car on the right road, to keep it from driving you both into the ditch. I know you think we had the perfect marriage, that we were as matched as two socks. But what you saw was the result of sixty years of holding on to that wheel—with two pairs of hands. One person isn’t strong enough to do it, although there will be days when you’ll feel like you’re the only one steering that car. Trust in your love. And trust that during the tough days ahead—and there will be tough days, just as there will be days so wonderful you will think you have kissed the edge of heaven—trust that the other three wheels will carry you.”

A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy had a collection of marbles. The girl had some sweets with her. The boy told the girl that he will give her all his marbles in exchange for her sweets. The girl agreed. The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl gave him all her sweets as she had promised. That night, the girl slept peacefully. But the boy couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl had hidden some sweets from him, the way he had hidden his best marble.

Moral of the story: If you don't give your hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always keep doubting if the other person has given their hundred percent... whether in love, friendship, professional relationships, or indeed in anything you do. Give your hundred percent to everything you do and sleep peacefully.

To contact , get blessings ,to get answers and solutions for any of your problems in your life  please contact immediately Swamiji Sri Selvam Siddhar in USA l @ 408 829 7780. Toll Free( in USA & Canada): 1-888-808 1418 or 1-888-808-1428. Email: avtemple@aol.com



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